If you read Protecting the Gift and it resonated with you, you're going to love Kidpower.

One of the moms in our local homeschooling group is a coordinator (and teacher). I've been reading some of her pamphlets (as she provided them to me when I'd ask questions) and last night she gave a presentation to some of us (everyone who was interested in the homeschooling group) and I was BLOWN AWAY!

Protecting the Gift is great for planting the seed, but "Kidpower" fertilizes, cares for and cultivates that seed. Kidpower teaches methods for facilitating interpersonal relationships and self protection. It is just as applicable to a 1yo as it is to a 60yo.

Some principles:

1) The safety and self-esteem of a child are more important than anyone's embarrassment, inconvenience, or offense - theirs, ours, or anyone else's.

2) Just talking and hearing about dangers increases anxiety and fears. PRACTICING ways to deal with the problem builds confidence and reduces anxiety. (This sounds like teaching self defense (fighting) - but it is not - it is ways to enforce your boundaries.)

3) All of our feelings are normal, and the ability to acknowledge and talk about them promotes our health and safety. When we can do something with our feelings instead of blocking them, we have more power.

4) I belong to myself. Not just my body, but my personal space, my time my feelings, my spirit. All of me.

5) Some things are not a choice. This is true for adults as well as kids.

6) Anything that bothers me should NOT have to be a secret.

There is so very very much more. Here is something that just hit me. In our family, we have a "no hurting" rule. You are not allowed to hurt (with words or feelings) other members of our family. So, what is a child to do when Uncle Bob abuses him and safety is not nearby? With Kidpower - that rule would be replaced with "hitting and kicking are reserved for situations when safety is not available. Is safety available? (Am I alone or am I with "safety"?)"

THE RESPONSES:

• How do you do this without scaring your kids? We do NO "stranger danger" or other "self-protective" teaching in our family. My son is SO susceptible to fear that I think he would freak out and become a nervous wreck if he felt he always had to be "on guard." My kids don't know about molestation, kidnapping, incest, rape, whatever....and frankly, I *like* it that way. It does mean that I have to be doubly vigilant, because my kids are very trusting (though we do talk about trusting your instincts and that "yucky feeling" some people give you).

  Does this teach some sort of balance between complete ignorance (I don't think we're there) and the kids I know who stare at their feet in public because their scared stiff?

• That is the incredible thing about this program. The kids are not instructed about molestation or child abuse - it is a very simple concept of "my body" "my boundaries." So, if mom is tickling you and at first you like it (stranger is touching your hair and at first you like it) but then you change your mind and want it to stop, you have the tools to make it stop.

  A basic safey rule of "check first" - and you don't need to say, "I want you to always check first with me because I don't want a stranger to abduct you" - you can just make it a family safety rule. Before you allow someone to get close to you, offer you something, etc., CHECK FIRST.

  "Stranger" anxiety is not taught. "Good touch, bad touch" is not taught.